Cops face it all!

A 300-pound chimpanzee that broke free from its chains has been captured after briefly wandering around a Kansas City neighborhood and smashing out the window of a police car. Police Captain Rich Lockhart said the department got a call about noon Tuesday that a primate was on the loose a few miles from the Kansas City Zoo. Lockhart says the ape was actually a pet that escaped from its chains. Lockhart says efforts to shoot the animal, named Sueko, with a tranquilizer dart failed. The chimp climbed on a patrol car and struck the passenger-side window with its fist before running off. Its owner was eventually able to coax it into a cage. Lockhart says the owner has been cited for having a dangerous animal within city limits. True story, the photo is fake though!

The Germans are at it again, this time snorting...

German police detained a nightclub reveller they caught trying to snort amphetamines off the top of their unmarked patrol car. The 26-year-old began lining up the powdered drugs on the roof of the car in a disco car park, when the two police officers surprised him, a Nuremberg police spokesman said on Tuesday. The man had no idea the normal looking vehicle belonged to the police, and it was coincidence that the officers – who were walking by their parked car – discovered him just as he was about to take the drugs. “He's got horrible luck,” said Bert Rauenbusch, police spokesman in the southern German city.